Suburban or Excursion

[Harley]

Chasing the bigger gals around the bars and casinos over there does NOT qualify as being a “cattle rancher”.

 

[NYECOGunsmith]

Hmmm, strange phone call just now from a Mrs. H, wanting me to tell her how we go about castrating and branding steers...........and will it work on humans...........I didn't charge her for the info, and offered to lend her a well-used castrating knife (dull as a spoon, but for a single use should work) and to make her a custom branding iron, she asked for "Property of T&D, if found, DO NOT RETURN, NO REWARD!"

Gonna need a big ol fire to heat that iron!

And I don't chase need to the gals, that's what ropes were invented for, city boy!

 

[Harley]

Well now I know thats not true. Had it been her, she wouldn’t have taken the dull knife.

She would instead be looking for an old chainsaw that was almost out of gas. That way she could finish the rest manually with the chain.

Her motto is “Not only will I kill you, it will hurt the entire time you are dying!”

 

[NYECOGunsmith]

She didn't take the proffered dull knife, said she preferred the dull rusty chainsaw, said it was "marinating in saltwater and lemon juice".
Might wanna switch to yer cast iron BVD' s.

 

[tdyoung58]

We use to do bull riding when I was in the Navy .... Usually at an Air Force club.

Find a bar fly that will only dance with AF boys.
Wait until she's dancing, slide in across the dance floor on your knees and bite her on the ass and hold on for 8 seconds. Yeah, I got the scar above one eye, but I held on. We could usually get out of dodge before the MP's showed up.